Monday, November 29, 2010

15 weeks

I have so, so much to be grateful for this holiday season and Baby M is one of those many blessings. I'm still amazed at this process (I'm sure I will be the entire pregnancy) and that there is a tiny life growing inside me. God is truly awesome and I am so thankful for this gift He has given me.
How far along: 15 weeks

Size of baby: a navel orange, about 4 inches and 2.5 oz.

Total weight gain/loss: +3 lbs. (not too bad considering how much I ate over the past week!)

Maternity clothes: let's just say maternity jeans are amazing - so comfy and just in time for the eating season!

Gender: anxiously awaiting! We tried the "ring test" while we were in Hilton Head for Thanksgiving, but it was pretty inconclusive. It basically went back and forth in a circular motion, so it could be either one!
Movement: nothing I can feel yet but I pause every once in a while thinking it might be there. I can't wait to feel that fluttering!

Sleep: thankfully, still doing okay and taking advantage with lots of naps on the weekend.

What I miss: aside from the wine, I'm really doing okay.

Cravings: still mostly salty foods and now milk - I think because I've been getting heartburn so my body must be wanting it to calm things down??

Symptoms: I've been hit with round ligament pains this week and they hurt with every cough, sneeze and sometimes just on their own. It's so painful that I have to curl into a little ball to clear my throat. Ouch! Otherwise, I think I'm feeling pretty good and still feel very lucky.

Best moment this week: celebrating Thanksgiving with our families in Orlando and Hilton Head.

Monday, November 22, 2010

14 weeks

I've struggled with doubt this week. I don't really feel like I'm growing that much (a bump at this point would be really nice!) and I worry constantly that Baby M is somehow no longer okay. I cannot wait to begin to feel little flutters from his or her movement for the comfort of knowing that things are progressing as they should.
(okay, after seeing my photo comparison, I am feeling a lot better. where did that belly come from?!)

I've become so accustomed to what little symptoms I have that there are times where I can completely forget that I have a baby inside me. It's so surreal! I continue to pray for a healthy, strong baby and I have to put my trust in God that He is taking good care of both of us.
How far along: 14 weeks

Size of baby: about the size of a lemon, 3.5 inches and 1.5 oz.

Total weight gain/loss: +2 lbs. (we'll see how much more that changes after a week of Thanksgiving meals!)

Maternity clothes: still making use of my Bella bands on all pants but some work skirts and dresses still fit okay. I plan on buying some jeans this week so I'm more comfortable.

Gender: still waiting! I am very torn now. I was feeling boy all the way, but now it could be a girl. We'll find out in a few weeks!

Movement: nothing I can feel yet.

Sleep: I'm sleeping pretty well, minus a nightly potty break that varies from a 2 am wakeup to a 6 am wakeup, which really is a bummer because my alarm goes off 30 minutes later. I feel less tired than I did a few weeks ago, but I still get pretty exhausted and take advantage of naps all weekend.

What I miss: still my vino.

Cravings: still mostly salty foods.

Symptoms: I think I've been getting a small bit of heartburn at night - I've never really had it, so I am not sure if this is what I'm feeling. I also feel like I have a bad taste in my mouth and wish I could brush my tongue but it makes me gag. I've always felt that the hair on my tummy is a little dark, but lately I feel like it's even darker and more noticeable. Not very attractive, to say the least!

Best moment this week: going to Vero Beach to share the news with Ryan's aunt, uncle and grandma. They were all so excited and so, so sweet about it! Aunt Barb is thinking it's a girl - we should start a pool since everyone is convinced about it one way or the other.

Sharing the news in Atlanta

After practically busting at the seams each time I spoke to any of my friends in Atlanta, we finally got to go up and share the news in person. My mom and sisters were supposed to come down for a girls' weekend in Orlando but the plans never came through so Ryan and I decided to head north instead. It turns out one of my best friends was throwing a party that same weekend so the stars aligned and it worked out perfectly to have everyone together.
On our first night, we had a great time hanging out with family and celebrating Carter's 8th month with a bit of silliness.
It's so fun to watch Ryan with his nephew and I just can't wait for him to be a daddy. He is going to do such a great job!Kelly and Lincoln were amazing hosts as always and we had a great family meal at their house with the whole gang.Kelly and I took C to the neighborhood playground while Ryan wore the dogs out on the tennis court. He even went down the slide and showed off his crawling skills in the tunnel!
Meanwhile, Jax chased her cousins Westin and Tessa around the courts while gracious Ryan threw the ball for Wessie.
What a pretty pup!
It was a chilly day and we had to bundle up.On Saturday, we had a yummy Mexican lunch (that seems to be what I crave most these days) and Carter got to experience lemons and limes for the first time. His face was priceless!
We had some time just hanging out while we waited to go to the party - a Low Country Boil at Stef and Kent's.
C just loves his Uncle Ryan!
All of my sorority best buds gathered at the party and we had a great time catching up and visiting with each other. Allison even came down from Michigan, which was so surprising and fun, and I got to meet Nikki's new baby girl, Katie Beth. We missed Jeremy and Brian, but it was great to have everyone else together.I love these girls so much and I am so thankful that I can look to them for encouragement and support, not to mention tons of great advice for those who are already moms.
As always, our trip to Atlanta was too short and over too soon. But I loved being able to share the news about Baby M in person with so many dear friends and it was heartwarming to see the excitement and enthusiasm in each of them as they heard what was to come.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Sharing the news in Hilton Head

I already wrote about our trip to Hilton Head, where we got to share the news of Baby M with my family. Here are some photos from our few days there to help remember all the fun.
Lunch at the Salty Dog before everyone arrived. I was so nervous everyone would notice I didn't partake in the yummy Miami Vices and question why!So happy after sharing our news.My two wonderful sisters, on Mexican night where the kids got to cook.
I painted a onesie for nephew Carter to help in sharing the news. He's going to be a great cousin!
Some fun on the beach. (I'm mostly posting this to help remember my pre-baby beach bod and to give me motivation once Baby M arrives to get back to it!)Enjoying Carter's first trip to the beach.He seemed to like it okay, but wasn't super thrilled about the sand and waves.A family tennis tournament.We had a great time showing off our skills!And one last lunch at the Salty Dog before hitting the road and heading home.
We had a great time practicing with C!

Monday, November 15, 2010

13 weeks

One trimester down, two to go! I can't believe how fast this is going. Slow down Baby M! I am not even close to ready yet!!

I am in constant awe at the miracle of life growing inside of me. Have I mentioned that God is SO good?! While I still feel minimal symptoms (I know, don't hate me - I feel so, so lucky) and don't think I've changed very much, the picture below says it all. No wonder most of my pants won't zip! I can't wait for that to be a real bump! (And hopefully it will stay right there, and not migrate to other places like my face or arms.)

And while I am slowly changing, the munchkin is growing at a rapid pace. We had a 12 week check-up and NT scan so we got to see Baby M on the ultrasound again. It was a great appointment and everything is looking good. He/she went from a hula-dancing shrimplet at 8 weeks to a wiggle baby with fingers and toes at 12 weeks. Adorable!
Here are some other fun stats to help me remember this amazing experience:

How far along: 13 weeks

Size of baby: depending on where you check, either a peach or a lemon. At the appointment on Tuesday, munchkin was about 2.5 inches long.

Total weight gain/loss: According to my appointment, about 1.5 pounds. Thank you Lord! For whatever (vain) reason I have been terrified of blowing up too quickly, so I am thankful it is so low but also now concerned munchkin is getting enough nutrients. The worrying never ends once it begins, does it?!

Maternity clothes: my wonderful mom and sis bought me a few items and I've worn one top so far. Otherwise, I am making use of the Bella bands on my regular pants for as long as I can.

Gender: we shall see! I've been thinking boy because of the lack of morning sickness, but at the ultrasound our tech told us of a new theory and based on "the angle of the dangle" she thinks girl! We will definitely find out, either way. It's making the planning too hard not to know!

Movement: nothing I can feel yet, but the munchkin was definitely wiggling and moving all around on the ultrasound.

Sleep: I have found my trick - two pillows to elevate my head. It helps relieve some back pain I've had since before getting pregnant and (minus any potty breaks during the night) I've been sleeping much better.

What I miss: WINE! I basically haven't changed much else, so there isn't much to miss.

Cravings: random things here and there (baked potato, jelly doughnut, everything bagel) but mostly salty food, especially Mexican.

Symptoms: still a bit bloaty and gassy, more irritable at work, and still overall tired. I've also come down with a bad cold, so that's not helping.

Best moment this week: seeing Baby M do flips on the ultrasound and getting to hear that precious heartbeat again!

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Looking back over the past two months

So here's what you missed while I was away from the blog...it may be a bit TMI but this blog is really for me to remember, so pardon the honesty if you think it's too much. Brace yourself...it's a long one!



Jan. 2010 - Aug. 2010


After much anticipation and discussion, we were ready to add to our family! But after thinking it could be timed and planned perfectly, God showed me that wasn't exactly what He had in mind and we waited. And waited.


Each month that passed brought more tears and doubt. Would this ever happen? Was there something wrong? I cried to Ryan each time it was clear we weren't pregnant and I truly felt for all the couples out there that struggle with infertility.


I went through some blood testing and doctor visits and all confirmed that I was "normal." The stress starting eating at me and we decided to take a quick weekend trip away to try and stop thinking about it. Hence, the Breakers.


In the meantime, I knew God was trying to teach me a lesson in patience. Something I've struggled with my whole life. Deep down, beyond the stress and doubt, I knew He knew what He was doing and I tried to faithfully wait.




Sept. 10, 2010

We celebrated a friend's birthday with a fat-fest of a meal at Texas de Brazil. To avoid suspicion (and really, because I just really wanted to) I had some wine with dinner. Screw it, I thought. It's probably not happening this month anyway.



Sept. 11, 2010


For the past (what felt like an) eternity, I always seemed to look up at the clock right when it hit 9:11. Was God sending a message? Was something supposed to happen today? My period was supposed to start...and didn't. Hmm...



Sept. 12, 2010


I spent the morning with old work friends, having brunch at Suzanne's new house, catching up with the girls and asking Julia 20 questions about her impending arrival of baby Calvin. On my way home, I stopped at Publix for the weekly groceries and didn't even think twice about grabbing a pregnancy test. This time I splurged and got the digital kind. I was sick of misreading the faint or nonexistent lines and wanted a clear, definitive answer.


After getting home and unloading the groceries, I went right into the bathroom and worked some magic on the first test. I didn't tell Ryan what I was doing, I was just determined to get some kind of resolution. I sat there watching the little timer blink on and off, on and off.


I must have looked away for a second because when I looked back it had finished "thinking" - and it said clear as day PREGNANT. Really? No, really, seriously? God, is this for real? (I'm pretty sure I had the same reaction when Ryan proposed.) A smile started to crack along my lips and tears welled up in my eyes. It was positive. We were going to have a baby!

I walked out into the living room to see Ryan and Jax lounging on the couch, football on the tv and Ryan holding a finished apple core. (Not the most ideal time to make an announcement, I know.) I held up the test and showed him and he looked at the test, then back up at me, and back and forth. Finally, he started to get up and asked if he could throw away the apple first. Haha. He came back and we hugged in disbelief, not really sure what to do.


It was a pretty surreal afternoon, snuggling on the couch together and talking baby but trying not to jinx things. I took another test that night just to be safe. It was still positive.



Sept. 18, 2010

I can't believe I held the news in for an entire week at work. I did all I could to avoid conversation with my family, which was helped by the fact that we were all distracted packing up for a trip to Hilton Head together and each phone call was completely focused on the trip itself.

We got to town at the same time as Alex (my sis), Jess and her boyfriend Alex and all met up at the house right as my aunts and uncles were unpacking. No sign of my parents yet. How was I going to go about the day without saying anything?!


A late lunch in South Beach at the Salty Dog helped prolong things and by the time we got back, more folks were arriving at the house. It was a little (a lot) self-centered to think people would be looking at me and thinking things like, why isn't she drinking yet? or is she gaining weight? Crazy, I know. But I was paranoid all evening none the less.


Finally, everyone got to the house and most of the people I wanted to tell were in the same room. I ran upstairs to my suitcase and grabbed a onesie I had painted for nephew Carter to help us share the news, stuffing it in my pocket on my way back down. Thankfully, the last missing person (Alex) came in right as I was walking back into the room so I grabbed her and made her stop while I said we had something for Carter.


As I laid the onesie that said "#1 Cousin" over his belly, the room erupted and Kelly actually started crying! It was an out-of-body experience to be able to share such exciting and long-awaited news with my family in person. Hugs all around and anyone that was outside came flooding in to see what the fuss was about. It was amazing!



Sept. 19 - 21, 2010


It was such a treat to be in Hilton Head with my family to be able to talk about things and share in my nervousness and joy. I felt really good, symptom-wise, and still got to enjoy our typical vacation activities like beaching it and playing tennis. Funny enough, of our other Orlando friends that have a baby or are expecting, each couple found out the week before a trip to Hilton Head. It's a special place for us!



Sept. 28, 2010


First doctor appointment. I was cautiously optimistic that we would get an ultrasound or hear a heartbeat or something, but it was a pretty low key, boring visit. Ryan came with me and after an hour wait the nurse finally took us back for what felt like an interogation.


We finally made it to a room and Ryan got to experience the joys of a female exam because I had to strip down right in front of him. Needless to say, he was a little freaked out and chose to stand behind the curtain when the doctor finally did his thing.

We got to ask all of our questions and the doctor was very patient as I pulled out my notebook. He's very laid back and I appreciate his approach that basically anything is okay if you're used to it. If something bad is going to happen, it's going to happen and what you do (exercise/activity) or eat (deli meat, sushi) is not going to affect things. I'm trying to believe it but I'm also being a bit more cautious for now.

Oh, and my due date was confirmed. May 20, 2011. My 30th birthday. Amazing!


Oct. 2, 2010


So far, I am feeling really good, which is starting to worry me. Originally, my boobs hurt so bad that hugs were painful, I was instantly more tired and voraciously hungry all the time. No real nausea, definitely no throwing up, and nothing major to report. As time has passed, I have been super bloated (my jeans were uncomfortably tight yesterday), I'm still hungry (like, I feel like such a little piggy and am super worried about weight gain) and I've been a bit crampy.


Still no sickness and only the rare need for Sprite. It's so unreal to me and I keep thinking maybe something is wrong, but I haven't had any spotting or any spec of blood, so I am sure it's fine. My first ultrasound is scheduled for Friday, so I am anxiously awaiting a chance to hear a tiny heartbeat with all prayers focused on a healthy, strong baby still growing inside me. In the meantime, I'll take what little symptoms I have!



Oct. 8, 2010


Second doctor appointment. It was a-m-a-z-i-n-g. We went back for an ultrasound and I instantly loved how personable and engaging our tech was. She and Ryan made conversation while I changed into a gown and then the show began.


As she moved the wand around inside me (it was vaginal vs. on my tummy), little blobs came in and out of focus and they she stopped on this tiny little hula-dancing wiggle worm. Our munchkin!


We could see the chest cavity vibrating and when she turned on the speakers a resounding "bump-a-thump" played for us. 150 bps. Praise the Lord! A good solid heartbeat. I couldn't help but tear up and grip Ryan's hand even harder. What a miracle growing inside me!

She took a bunch of measurements and Baby M checked in at about 7 weeks, 4 days - a few days shy of what we were thinking. She kept my due date just the same, though, which is helpful to remember. Everything looked great and we got our first baby portraits.


Going to work after getting such elating news was really tough. How can any pregnant lady focus knowing what is happening inside her? I ended up telling my boss the news at the end of the day but swearing her to secrecy.

We went to dinner with Mike and Lindsay that night and knowing we'd heard a healthy heartbeat, we felt good about sharing the news with them, too. Also being pregnant, Lindsay was concerned about eating goat cheese so I asked the waitress if it was pasturized and as she went off to check, I said it was because I had to worry about that now, too. The look on Lindsay's face was priceless - such a double-take and disbelief, and both of them immediately jumped up and gave us hugs. I am thrilled that we get to share this time together and am so thankful to have someone else to talk to and ask questions through the process.



Oct. 18, 2010


Two whole years of wedded bliss already under our belt. I can't believe how fast the time flies and I know it's only going to get faster. We spent a very low key evening together. Ryan bought me flowers and the baby a giant teddy bear - so sweet. Then we ate at Wazzabi for a lovely dinner...that is until my stomach decided it hated the food and I got really sick. By 8, I was back home and in so much pain and by 8:30 I was curled up on the couch fast asleep. So much for big celebration!




Oct. 23, 2010


My first "good" craving (according to Ryan, who has declared I can't crave things like baked potatoes - which I have) - I saw a commercial for Arby's curly fries and have to have some. Thankfully, hubby was running out and was nice enough to get me some on the way home. They definitely hit the spot! I've also been jonesing for a jelly doughnut, but have yet to fulfill that one.



Oct. 27, 2010


At 10+ weeks, I am still feeling (generally) really good and so thankful that I haven't had to experience morning sickness or any other major problems. Symptoms I have had - I've definitely lost my appetite a few times at dinner, have an aversion to red meat at the moment, and am amazed at the gassy/bloatiness that has overtaken my midsection. Thankfully, until the batteries died yesterday morning, I seemed to have only gained 1 lb although it fluctuates so much from morning to night. I have also experienced nausea on many occassions, which I liken to a hangover without the fun the night before.


I have been hit by exhaustion this past week and the thought of exercise is fleeting and depressing because I know I need to be doing it but it makes me want to cry to even picture myself going for a walk. Hopefully that will pass, because I am terrified of this making the delivery process torture and the impending weight gain even worse.

I am still hungry all day long, which makes things at work a little tricky trying to fit snacks in between meetings. I also broke down and bought two belly bands last weekend, which I have been sporting in the office for the past two days. As paranoid and self concious as they make me, no one has noticed and it is way more comfortable than trying to button my pants, so I am thankful for the investment. I don't feel like I show in the mornings - my tummy is still relatively flat. But by the end of the workday and into the night, I feel so bloated and huge. Hopefully it's just in my head and no one is noticing yet!

Emotionally, I feel pretty even keel and have only had a couple of meltdowns (that to be honest, probably would have happened regardless of being pregnant). It's still so surreal to me and I've tried not to focus too much attention on planning or baby talk because there just seems to be so much time and so much risk. I'll feel better in a couple weeks when we go back to the doctor and get to see the munchkin on the big screen again.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Big changes in the Morgan house

That's right, you read it correctly...

Ryan and I are over the moon with excitement that we will be welcoming our first little Baby M in May 2011! While we've waited anxiously for this news for many months, God has shown He is so good and that His plans are obviously best no matter what we think we want.

So now you can understand (maybe) while I've been a bit mum for the last couple of months. We found out early September and it was impossible to post anything that wasn't related to this amazing news, so I basically went into hiding until we could share it with our family and friends. But now that most everyone knows, I am ready to start blogging again (much to the joy of all 3 of you that read it. ha!)

I've kept a log since that fateful day when the stick said "Pregnant" and I'll go back and post what has happened since then. It's already been an amazing ride and I am so looking forward to the next 6 months so we can prep for the little munchkin!

Where have you been all my life?

Wow, okay. I know I've been gone a while. I just didn't realize it had been 2 months+ since my last post. Yikes!

Lots of catching up to do, and I promise I have posts in the work to do just that. Stay tuned...they're coming!